Week 4 Day 1

Wow! This push-up challenge is getting....challenging! Last night I barely did it. My arms hurt. My joints ached. It's a great feeling to finish what you started.

I took a few extra days of rest knowing that it was going to get harder. I thought it would help, but I am not sure it did. I will find out tomorrow, with a 1 day rest which is better for my body right now.

I don't want to injure or over work any part of my body where I wouldn't be able to carry on with the challenge. This morning, my shoulder joints were a little crampy. I hope I am not too old for such a challenge. (I know I'm not, plenty of decade older individuals can do pretty much whatever they want with their bodies when it comes to exercise) but I am certainly starting to feel older.

Your body always has a way of reminding you that you aren't 17. Luckily, if we listen to our bodies, and take things slow, we can strengthen them and stretch them how we need to. Aging doesn't mean a thing if you are willing to take care of yourself though diet and exercise on a regular basis. You really are only as old as you allow yourself to be.

Life is ALL about choices!

It certainly is, isn't it?  Should I workout today or wait until tomorrow?  Should I eat this apple or dive into that cookie?  Should I make good choices or bad choices?  Am I going to start today and do what I need to do to feel good or should I wait until tomorrow or Monday?  Life is about choices, always has been, always will be.

I have always been a black and white person, all or nothing.  Mediocracy and the grey area have never been in my nature.  Although in some areas this might be good, I am finding that it doesn't apply to everything.

In efforts to loose the last bit of weight and to create a lifestyle the invites health, I have learned that it can't be taken with an all or nothing attitude.  While an "all" attitude gets your workouts in and has you eating healthy and doing healthy behaviors, a person can burn out and can find themselves in the "nothing" attitude.  This attitude will undo all the good you did when you were doing the "all."  It creates a yo-yo of your life.  I spent well over a decade with this type of outlook.  I gained a lot more then I ever lost with this outlook as well.  All or nothing hasn't worked at all for me in my weight loss journey.

What I have found that has caused success isn't mediocracy either.  I never thought that I was living in the "gray area" either, I have realized that I HAVE been.  I have been doing well with the exercise and for the most part I have been eating well, but I need to do better.  Being in the grey area of things leaves you wanting to do better.  So in pondering recently, the thought of choices has become apparent.  You can be having a challenging day and you just want to do nothing at the end of it.  But here lies a choice.  Do you continue doing nothing being engulfed by the challenge of the day, or do you make a choice to do something else, something that gets you closer to your life's goals?  For instance, at the end of a day where the kids have been challenging, the house is a mess and I just want to do nothing, I have a choice.  Do I just sit on the couch and watch TV or get lost in a book and "relax" or do I do something that has me going to bed one step closer to my desired lifestyle?  I have the choice to workout and know I did something to get me closer to the goal of the lifestyle I want to create.  Nevermind that I didn't eat as well as I would have liked, or that I didn't fold the laundry or get some computer work done, I made the choice and worked out.  In that moment of decision, I decided to make a choice that brought me closer, not farther from my goals.

In life so often we are a victim of circumstance.  We just go through life and blame the things around us for not being or doing the things we want.  "I am too busy to focus on myself."  "If only I had more time." "If I had more money, time, health, space, happiness..." You fill in the blank.  This is easy to do and to get caught up in.  In life, I have learned, that you need to make the decision and then to make the choices that follow that decision.  It's our human nature to also sabotage ourselves.  We get used to a certain thing a certain schedule and we sabotage ourselves out of fear of what we could have. If you want something for yourself, you need to fight for it.  If you don't, you'll probably never achieve it.  In my life, if I want to have the lifestyle in which I dream of, it's not going to be handed to me and it's certainly not going to be easy or I would be living it right now.  I am going to have to fight for it.  I will have to make choices that bring me closer and avoid the ones that bring be farther.  We aren't stagnant in our lives.  We are either moving towards our goal or away from it, and it's always by choice.  If we are in a place we don't want to be, it's because we have chosen to be there through the choices we have made.

With this in mind, I find myself making better chioces.  By knowing that in every choice I am either getting closer or farther from my goal I must remember the decision I have made.  The decision to make choices that will bring me closer to my lifestyle goal.  Since I have made this decision to get closer to my goal, the choices will eventually get easier simply by the practice of doing so.  If I find a choice that is challenging, I will have to fight to achieve my goal.  The achievement of goals in life is not given, or stumbled across by accident, they are fought for.  

100 Push Ups

So last night, week 3, day 2, I did 5 sets that totalled 100 push-ups, it was uncomfortable, but cool that I did it!  The sets were 20-25-15-15-25.  Needless to say my arms were jello afterwards, but my arms have a shape I have never seen before which is rewarding.

I feel strong, but the sets are rapidly increasing and I hope I can do it.  In the instructions for the challenge, it states that if a week is super difficult, you can repeat until it's not.  This may be in my future.  One more day to finish this week, I think I can...I think I can...I think I can...I KNOW I CAN!!!

First Push-Up "Test"

So with the push up challenge that we are doing, they periodically have you test to see how many you can do before falling to the ground, tonight is the first one.  I started the whole challenge being able to do 30, I hope there is some sort of improvement when I do it tonight....

I just did 50 in a row!  

I am half way there with 4 weeks left of the program!  :o)

On another pleasant note, I am down 2 pounds since the beginning of the year!  (I finally lost what I found around the holidays!) Things are looking good!  I have learned that I personally HAVE to work out everyday to keep in control of my weight!  This month has been quite busy and I am a little embarrassed to say that all my workouts haven't been 30 minutes.  I have committed to 1 chapter of HP a night, which means that my workouts are between 15-30 minutes.  Small payoff to be at peace at the dinner table.

It's working...

It is so easy to do 30 minutes when reading a good book. About the time I am done with the chapter, it's time to hop off the machine. What I am finding is that when the time is up, I am not ready to put down the book. I need to start earlier so I can workout longer when the story line gets moving.

Also, great suggestions from friends online on how to show the 100 push up goal when I make it. (Thinking optimistically of course!) 4.5 more weeks and we'll see what I decide to do!

Habits

So the habit of last year's 365 day work out goal has stuck with me. So far this year, I have worked out everyday but Sundays. It's my sabbath day and I am going to rest! Keeping with the "Can't miss a day" is really motivating for me. It's amazing to have a workout goal stick for a change. I am indeed grateful!

One week down with the push-up challenge and I'm feeling good. I feel hopeful and strong. The thought of busting out 100 push-ups in a row still seems like crazy thoughts, but I am up for the challenge. 5 more weeks to go!

As for eating, the holidays found a few bothersome habits, namely, sugar. It takes me several days of determination to get that stuff out of my system so it no longer bothers me, and I haven't had the chance to really focus on that. So I am going to give up sugar entirely for awhile. Can't promise that tomorrow will be the first day of sugar abstinence, but it's coming soon.

Week 1 Day 1

So far so good. Did the first day of the challenge after my elliptical workout and it was great! Did a total of 56 push-ups. I can't even imagine doing 100 consecutive push-ups. I will be pleased if I could do 100 in one work out with breaks. To just bust out 100 without stopping, that seems crazy!! But I am willing to give it a try...

Here is the plan..

Read up on this site, take the initial test and then join in with me on this challenge starting Monday, January 11th. What a great time to work on the upper body! By summer, everything should be looking great in time for suits and summer tops !!

Great Recommendation!

I posted on Facebook what I was doing in regards to the push-up challenge and a friend recommended hundredpushups.com It's a program that trains you to do 100 consecutive push-ups within a six week period. I am excited to give this a try and see where 6 weeks will take me!

Upper Body

Something new to add to the mix. A friend and I have challenged each other to do push-ups everyday and to be accountable to each other. We have to do a minimum of 30 and we are starting by doing 3 sets of 10 each day. Last night was the first night, I never realized I was so crunchy before. I am not sore today, but we'll see tomorrow.

Harry Potter is My New Best Friend

I really enjoyed the last Harry Potter movie. Knowing that even good movies lack all the finer details of a book, I thought I would get the set and use it as an opportunity to spend some quality time with the elliptical. I love to read, but I just don't have time for it this month and after the holidays, I need some special time with the machine. So, it's a win-win. Time to get lost in a fascinating story while burning some serious calories. I made last year's goal and I intend on making this year's goal, despite my alternate personality who enjoyed the holidays a little more than she should have.

Bring on 2010

A whole new year, full of possibilities! I think I have the regular working out habit solidly formed, but I need to amp things up this year! This Christmas I learned that although I might have overcome the working out regularly obstacle, I still have to work on my eating habits. For the most part, they are good, but that 190 pound lady can still be found inside from time to time. I was really surprised to find myself "feeling" heavy again. It really is a mental thing and if one isn't careful, they can sabotage themselves simply by giving into their feelings.

I keep saying this and I am using this as motivation. My weight is good, but I would like it to be better. For instance, in the morning, my BMI is "healthy" but by the time the evening comes my BMI is "Over weight." Talk about messing with the brain! I want my BMI to be "Healthy" no matter what time of day it is.

So for 2010, I am going to work at getting my brain in a healthy mode. To have my brain match my weight. There are days that my brain feels 190 and starts acting like it. I know this all sounds like crazy talk but it's true. When a person looses physical weight, they need to make sure they are loosing the mental weight too. Now I am not talking about emotional hang-ups and issues that can also act as "weight." I am talking about the perceptions we have of ourselves.

If you have gone decades being a certain body type, you get used to eating, exercising, shopping and living in that body type. I see this happen to others - it happened to me! You get on a program or you do something that works and the weight drops. You are surprised because you can't believe it actually worked. Then you find yourself in unfamiliar territory. Clothes fit. Your body feels good. Things are just different, different for the good of course! But if you are still seeing the world through an overweight perception, you will find yourself back at the familiar weight when you get off the program or start changing the habits that gave you success. It happens all the time!!

So this year, I am going to keep with the daily workouts (minus Sundays) and going to amp them up a bit. For that last part of the year, being so busy, I just didn't have my 30 minutes to exercise in the evening so I started to bump up the level and cut back on the time-level 15 for 15 minutes. (This works great in building muscles) but after the holidays I need to focus on the cardio. I just "feel" so heavy! So I am going to keep the level up and now also bump up the time. My goal is to start February doing 30 minutes at level 15. I love a good book and when I don't have time to read I try to do two things at once, workout and read. A good book keeps me on the elliptical longer by passing the time and I can get some good reading in too. It's a win-win!

I am also going to try to purge my body of sugar by reducing it dramatically. The holidays can be so indulgent with the sugar. I need to get rid of these cravings!!

So my big goal of 2010 is to have an OFFICIAL "AFTER" picture to share on this blog. One that I am proud of where my body and brain match in weight with a healthy BMI 24/7!!

Day 365 - I DID IT!!

WOW!! A whole year has passed since I started this crazy goal! I honestly can't believe how quickly time passes in a year. When I was a child, a year seemed like a decade, now a year seems like what a month used to be.

Anyway, it's a bittersweet day! I was a little bummed because I have pretty much maintained my weight the last 6 months. Am I complaining, NO WAY! But I don't have an "after" photo to share today. I think I may have lost focus. The goal at the beginning of the year was to workout 365 days in a row. That was it. I made no mention to weight because weight wasn't the focus. Had I hoped it would effect my weight in a positive manner, sure. But it wasn't the focus and I knew it couldn't be because when you focus on something that naturally fluctuates, you can loose sight of the goal.

Tonight, after I finished my workout I walked out to a bunch of cheering when I walked into the living room. My hubby reminded me of the success that I achieved, success which I may have missed if it weren't for my family to remind me. Dang! I worked out 365 days in a row, rain or shine, traveling or home bound, sick or healthy!! That IS an accomplishment even if I am not feeling it right now.

2010 is the beginning of a new decade and this is going to be the year that I continue with what I started. I plan on continuing my daily workouts, minus Sundays. So I really can't make another 365 days in a row goal or a 730 day goal either. But I can say that I learned a lot this year. The biggest thing is that if I can workout daily and watch my portions, I can have a weight that I am happy with. Simple.

I am going to continue to blog my progress. I have more things to learn and share because as the title of this blog states, it's my weight loss journey, and I am not to my goal weight yet. Being at the upper end of a healthy BMI is like playing with fire. I want to be in a healthy range that is strong.

Happy New Year!! May 2010 bring many blessings to all!

Day 350 - A Journey With No Ending (A Personal Discovery)

FINALLY, my 3 week virus has finally died a permanent death! I have learned a lot during this time that I wanted to share.

1. My body and appetite are directly effected by my exercise program. While I was sick, I lightened my workout and ate regularly. During this time of year, eating regularly isn't a good thing. I haven't binged, but if you take a bite of all the yummy things you are given or make, it tends to add up. With these two things happening, I noticed the scale starting to creep! I am grateful that my mentality now is that if the scale starts to creep, I get back into my good habits and it creeps back down. Before, I would just say, "Whatever", continue eating and doing what I was doing that brought on the extra weight and just not look at the scale for a time since I knew it was going up. Needless to say, if I don't workout, I will not be able to maintain and I will most certainly gain weight. Maintenance is NOT an option if I am not working out.

2. Even though I have worked out every day in 2009, lost 40 pounds and gained a body I can be happy about, I have found naughty eating patterns slipping back! When I realized this I was thinking, "What the heck? Have I learned nothing??" It became apparent to me that this journey doesn't have an ending, it's a journey for life. I can be thin and doing the things that bring health, but inside me, there is always that part that if left unchecked, will cause weight gain and will enjoy unhealthy behaviors. Which leads me to #3.

3. I ALWAYS NEED TO BE ON MY GUARD!! If not, bad behaviors will creep back when illness or stress are experienced. This realization is what brought me to the computer tonight. When I first started this journey and decided to make better food choices so I could loose weight, I was in the mindset to make good choices, to do the things needed to loose weight. To find the tricks and substitutes needed to bypass those things that would prevent me from being unsuccessful. As months went by, and these new behaviors became routine, I didn't have to think so much about it. They were positive habits, things that were coming naturally and that would give me the results I liked. I entered the holiday season with a plan, but the mindset wasn't there. I got cocky and didn't really think so much about the decisions that needed to be made to continue weight loss. I find myself today, with a plateful of Christmas cookies. I didn't down a bunch like I normally would have, but I did use a knife and take a taste of each of them. Those little bites add up! I didn't use the technique I used to use when I would stop, take a moment and think about what it would taste like and realize that I didn't really want it after all. That is a necessary thing to do this time of year because there is just TOO much good stuff. You CAN'T take little bites because when you have 12 things you take a bite of, it's like eating a few! Any other time of year, a bite or two of something would be fine, but this is the season where there is just too much.

So I end this post with a reminder to myself, never let your guard down, never search for that light at the end of the tunnel, and NEVER, NEVER, EVER take your foot off the elliptical for more than 24 hours.

Day 341 - Still sick and getting tired of it.

Yes, I am still sick! I don't know if this is a continuation of what hit me around Thanksgiving, or something new. It's been a week now and I swear I am only feeling worse! There are nasty viruses our there so TAKE CARE of yourself!! Lots of Vitamin C and good food so that you can stay healthy!

So while I am feeling down, I have still been working out! Of course I have shortened the time and intensity so that my body can focus on killing the virus. I feel so lame climbing off the elliptical after 5 minutes, but what do you do when your sick and your lungs are burning? Honestly, when I start working out, I could go for a lot longer, but I know I would pay for it.

I thought I would share a yummy recipe that I made that makes be feel so good while sick. The whole family gobbled it! I got it off of a friend's website here. It's creamy chicken noodle soup. So easy to make, certainly not low fat, but full of real ingredients (Unlike the weird ones you'll find in canned soup). With a portion of this soup, you are left feeling warm, full, and I swear, a little bit healthier! The epitome of comfort food!

I am feeling super motivated for next year and a new goal!

Hope you are enjoying the Christmas Season and are staying well!

Day 336 - A Little Kettlebell

Since I accept the fact that I will unlikely loose 8 pounds this month, that doesn't mean I don't have a plan. A dear friend of mine got some wonderful results from adding Kettlebell to her workout. I am going to add it to mine and try to firm up a bit this month. There are a ton of videos online that show kettlebell exercises. No matter what, you build muscle when you use them!

Today I have had some fierce cravings for some sweets. I had sweets over Thanksgiving weekend, and with leftovers, a few now and then the last few days. I have learned that it takes a few days to get it out of your system. Sugar is really an addictive substance because you crave it when you don't have it. Luckily, it's not hard to kick if you are at home, have no plans to leave and there aren't any sweets in the house. By tomorrow the cravings will subside, or at least lesson.

I now look at sugar and know that I will have to battle the cravings later. Understanding how sugar effects your body gives you information to use to your advantage later. So much better than wondering why I have such cravings. I used to hate to have such strong cravings I couldn't really control. I felt out of control and I would eat so much because of it. Now, understanding what sugar does, I can control IT much better. I can stay in control and keep my weight where I want it.

Day 335 - You CAN have your cake and eat it too...

...only have a few bites!  Seriously!  There is no reason to ever deprive yourself of the things you enjoy to eat.  The quantity, yes!  You can't fill yourself with your favorite foods AND be healthy.  PERIOD. It's not going to happen.  Either you want to do the things to bring health. Or you don't.  If you are not able to control the amounts of food you consume, you are accepting your current state of health.  You have agreed to stay there too. 

With our bodies and the desire for weight loss, our mind is more powerful than we give it credit.  It plays tricks on us.  We play tricks on it.  We try to fool ourselves and say that "tomorrow I will do better."  If you say this, you are basically saying that right now isn't a good time.  That you are not worth the time or the effort.  Waiting until tomorrow is procrastination.  Think about it.  If you REALLY want to do something about your health, if that desire is true, then right now is the time to make the change.  Anything other than "right now" means you aren't serious with taking care of yourself.  So the next question would be, why?  Why are you not worth the effort right now?  I have found myself saying these same questions to myself.  Some days, I don't want to hear it.  Other days, I ponder, try to figure it out, and usually, I have the ability to do better "now."

Over the last few days, getting back into my typical workout and making better food choices, I lost that extra weight I found during Thanksgiving. :o) I am starting to believe myself that it really isn't that hard to maintain if you only listen to yourself.  Stop ignoring the inner voice that wants to make good choices.  I had such a hard time before because I didn't want to hear myself.  I would give myself excuses why now isn't the right time to do better and how tomorrow would be.  There is so much psychology in weight loss and health maintenance.  I honestly believe that if we are honest with ourselves, we can overcome many of the obstacles that we have put there.  But if we aren't honest with ourselves, we are working against ourselves, and that doesn't work when trying to achieve a better lifestyle.

One of the biggest hangups I had when I was going through my life in a binge state, was looking at foods as being "bad" and "good."  When having a bad day, how easy is it to justify eating the "bad" foods?  You had a bad day, you deserve to relax and have some of the food that makes you feel good.  Honestly, if you have had a bad day, eating a bunch of carrots and brocolli isn't going to cut it.  But if there isn't such a thing as "bad" and "good" in foods, how much more free you are when a bad day comes around!  That alone will help free up brain space to deal with the day itself.  No guilt because you jammed a half a dozen of the nearest cookie down your throat.  If a cookie makes you happy and feel better, enjoy your cookie!  1 cookie won't make you gain weight, 1 cookie won't keep you from loosing weight either.  It's the ones you eat after that one that cause the trouble.  Sometimes, when I have had the kind of day where I used to binge after the kids are in bed, I now just have a bite of something, if anything at all and then I go do my workout.  After my workout, any desire for food is usually gone.  If not, just have a bite.  Seriously.  I know that the saying goes to "replace negative behaviors for positive" and I agree with that.  But often times, when you are just getting started on your journey, or if you have partially or even completely fallen off the wagon, that isn't easy and it's the little hang-ups that make it hard to get started or to continue.  I spent years saying "I'll do better tomorrow" and tomorrow took years to come.  So if you are starting to be serious and ready to make the changes needed to get on your journey and stay there, cut yourself some slack and take things slow.  Slow and steady wins the race. 

I really would like to finish my secondary goal of loosing 10 more pounds before the end of the year, but realistically, it most likely won't happen.  I have 31 days, it's the holidays, life is beyond busy, and if even one virus gets into the house, there is no way I'll be able to focus on such a goal.  Just the pressure of the goal itself is enough to make me want to eat.  So, I'll give it a good effort, maybe I'll reach the goal, probably won't, and I am okay with the outcome because I am okay with where I am.  Take the pressure away and you have more control.  Just getting through December at my current weight is a huge accomplishment and I can't discredit myself for that. 

So you CAN have your cake and eat it too.  Enjoy a few bites and get moving!!  Who wouldn't want to enjoy the foods they like AND wear the size and have the health they truly desire?  It is possible and I am proving it to myself each day!!

Day 332-Thanksgiving Weekend

Prayers were answered and I was able to taste my plate at our family dinner feast.  It was an interesting year since most of us were either getting over a virus or beginning one!  I was touch and go there for a bit, but about an hour before we ate, I suddenly felt clear and not stuffy, I felt pretty good!

I had been taking Emergen'C since the very first moment I felt like I was getting sick.  I swear by this stuff!  I think this is the reason I made it through the holiday without being stuck in bed.  I even had the energy to be able to help my mom out, she was really sick but pushed herself through so that we could enjoy a lovely Thanksgiving.

So, my plans were changed.  I wasn't able to work out as much as I wanted or hoped to.  I did smaller workouts because I was just too achy and weak to do full workouts.  The whole weekend I struggled with sugar cravings and portions.  I honestly felt like I used to.  Crazy how you can spend a whole year changing habits and behaviors, and within a couple of days you can resort back to what you are trying to avoid.

I learned something HUGE.  I have said it before, I honestly believe it, but this extended holiday weekend just proved it once again.  It's ALL ABOUT EXERCISE!!  Without my typical, sweaty workout, I had a hard time with my eating, the way I felt, my time on the scale.  (It was up a pound)  I did a full workout today.  At first it was way hard!  I wondered if I hadn't yet fully recovered from my illness.  Luckily something interesting was on the TV and I was able to push through and get it done, but I am surprised by how much and how fast a body can change when you deviate from routine.

It was a wonderful Thanksgiving weekend.  I had a wonderful time with family, had wonderful meals with everyone, and I learned a lot!  You can try to loose weight by your food choices alone, but it can be very slow and challenging.  You can also try to loose weight solely by working out, but if you don't change your eating habits, although you are gaining a better heart and body, you may not be seeing the results on the scale as fast as you would like and end up giving up the much needed exercise.  You need both to have results!  Eating better makes it easier to workout and working out makes it easier to eat better.  It has been proven to me once again.

Day 329 - Cold

I have a cold.  I am not happy.  I feel like poo.  I dragged myself to the elliptical because no stupid cold is going to make me break my goal.  It was a shorter workout, but a workout none-the-less.  I pray that my nose isn't so stuffy tomorrow that I can't taste the feast.  I hope I wake up all better.  I am thankful it's not the flu.  :o)

Day 328 - Thanksgiving is on it's way...

I LOVE this time of year!  Thanksgiving is my most favorite holiday of year for so many reasons!  Of course, the food is a huge factor, but not like it used to be.  I mostly love the holiday because of family.

In my family, it really hasn't changed since long before my oldest memory of childhood.  The location did change when my grandparents got to the point where they were no longer able to host.  The opportunity then fell upon my parents where I was able to have a more helping hand in a few of the preparations.

My mom and I get together and set the table and have time to just converse about the big day.  I always enjoy that time together. She's also makes detailed notes each year so that if she or my dad weren't able to do what they do, we'd be able to step in and help out.  Life is what it is and some day I know that it will be my husband and my turn to take on the duties, to carry on the tradition for this side of my family.  I pray it's not for several more decades.  I love watching my dad and smelling the roasted turkey as we walk into the house.  The smell of the stuffing, the yams, and all the other familiar aromas when settling into the livingroom and kitchen area.  I enjoy seeing the kids' excitement over the day. It's wonderful to just spend the day being around each other, relaxing, when time doesn't seem to exist.

It's the menu that has for the most part, remained the same.  Each year we all know the menu, know what to expect. There have been few variations to the main meal, and we all love that!!  This year my mom wasn't able to get the usual rolls that we have had with the meal for eons.  I pray there won't be a riot!  No, as much as things have remained the same, so many things have changed.  What once was my grandparents with their children and their families has now grown into a whole new generation.  I love the constant that it is in my life.  I have only missed one of these dinners in my 35 years of physical existance.

With so many Thanksgiving dinners behind me, this is the first one where I am not worried.  I am not worried of over eating, I am not worried about being deprived.  (Like that has ever happened in the history of me) I am not worried about feeling out of control.  This is the first Thanksgiving that I can go, and honestly enjoy the whole day without a bit of anxiety over what passes my lips.  I am excited and I have a plan!

I am going to have a good, solid workout in the morning.  I am going to have a late breakfast that has a balance of carbs and protein around 10ish so that I don't go into Thanksgiving dinner at 2 ravished.  I am going to fill my plate with small servings of foods I adore!  When dessert comes around, I am going to have partial servings of the things I like so when I sit down I'll have 4 different types of dessert making up 1 maybe 2 actual servings.  The plan is to not go back for seconds. What happens if I do? It could happen. But maybe I'll just keep a balance of my carbs and protein so that my appetite doesn't control me.  At the end of the day, I will only have had 2 main meals and dessert that could count for a 3rd meal.  If I keeps portions down, I'll get my fill without over doing it.  My desire to binge hasn't been there now that I have allowed myself whatever I would like.  The fact there are no "no-no" foods, they don't hold control over me.  I have a bite or two, and I'm good.  If I feel I have eaten more than I should, I can also just do a mini workout (5-10 min.) when I get home.  Something to get my heart pumping and my metabolism started, just to help things along. Ever walked after being stuffed?  You feel so much better than if you just sit and do nothing.  It finally feels so wonderful not to be a slave to the holiday I adore.